Our beautiful little Luna Bug turned ONE on Sunday. That seems like such a big milestone for some reason. Maybe because now it really does mean that we don’t have any ‘babies’ any more. She has a proper age. Aurora could not understand the whole ’11 months’ idea, so she will have a lot more clarity now.
We didn’t want to do anything too crazy, but it was so nice to be able to celebrate her first birthday with our families, as both Aurora’s first and second birthdays were during lockdowns/restrictions.
We gathered both of our families together at my grandparents and had a wonderful time celebrating. Such a wholesome day filled with the people we love. The girls had the best time playing with their cousins and Aunts and Uncles, as well as their grandparents, and great grandparents (GG and Darling) It was a truly beautiful day. This is what I want more of. It really does make my soul happy.
The party was obviously so exhausting that everyone, Luke included, slept the entire drive back to Somerset. So, I had a rather indulgent journey listening to Happy Mum, Happy Baby podcast the whole way home. WIN!
We unfortunately, upon returning home, found some spots on Aurora that looked like they could potentially be chicken pox. The dreaded virus that we all know will find our little ones eventually but can never arrive at a good time. Luckily all of my NCT mums have been through it already, so I have a good network to lean on and ask all the questions I may have. I was prepared for it to either be a disturbed night, or for Aurora to wake up absolutely covered in more spots (or both!) but there were no new spots.. She did not seem ill in any way, so we thought that maybe they were insect bites and carried on with our lives.
She went to Pre School, I was at work, and Luke received a phone call after 1.5 hours saying that Aurora had developed 2 spots on her face since being there, so could he go and pick her up. They had had 8 cases of Chicken Pox in that class that day! (I’m assuming most had not been in, just called to say) So we figured that they probably all caught it just before the Easter Holidays, then that was the perfect 2 week incubation period that you seem to get, and now it’s all coming out as they are set to return.
I left work a little early to go to Boots and collect all the necessary lotions and potions that I may need, prepared to see a very spotty child when I got home. She looked the same. I can’t figure out which two spots they saw develop when she was there… but I guess I must take their word for it, they will have had a lot more experience seeing them than I have. I have no idea, except from Google!
We are now two days after this, and she still hasn’t developed any more. I haven’t used the medication yet as I’m just really not convinced that it even is Pox!? I wish it was a little more black and white. She is on top form, potentially better than normal, so if it IS, then we are incredibly lucky that it doesn’t seem to be bothering her too much and she is being a champ. But more likely, it’s not Chicken Pox at all, and when she does get it, it will wipe her out.
The big test will be if Luna gets it, so the next fortnight will be a waiting game. I feel in limbo though as I feel irresponsible taking her out and about, or seeing anyone that hasn’t had Pox before. Plus, she will miss even more Pre School, after already being off for Easter, and potentially it isn’t even the virus… Help and advice needed!
Other than all of that, I really feel as though Aurora has turned a corner in regards to her frustration. She has been so funny, I spend almost all my days laughing at her. She is usually really sweet with Luna, and they’re really starting to play with each other a lot more. She loves making Luna laugh, and Luna finds her hilarious, so it’s a good match. Her little motivational encouragements that I overhear are so heart-warming. ‘Good standing Luna’, ‘Luna said Mummy!’
I can’t wait to see their relationship grow. I hope they get on as they get older. They seem quite different characters already, so I’m keeping everything crossed that that will work in their favour.
I have no experience of growing up with a sister, and if I’m honest, everything I have heard from friends that did, is pretty explosive. The general consensus is that they didn’t get on at all, in fact in some instances they actively hated each other, until they were teenagers, or older. So, hoping that we don’t have that experience here. If either of them are like me as a teenager, then we will have a monster on our hands, and if they are both like I was… Well. You’ll find me rocking back and forth in a dark room.
Luna’s walking is coming along. She’s still largely cruising along furniture and walls, but every so often she will let go, and walk from one side of the room to the other. I think it is all in there, she is fully capable, but feels safer crawling or cruising for the time being, and that is perfectly fine. Let’s not rush this, as once she has cracked it, there’s no turning back!
This evening as I was feeding her to sleep, we had such a lovely moment. I do feel as though I don’t get as many of these, second time around. With Aurora, all we had were moments. There were no other distractions, especially as we were in lockdown for a huge chunk of it.
With Luna I feel as though this first year has been an absolute blur. Gone in a flash. I don’t feel like I have savoured as much of it as I wanted to and I definitely don’t get enough time just with her. Always trying to get some house work done, or drink a (hot) cup of coffee, or prepare one of the 1,746 meals/snacks in a day, or have a wee (now a luxury), or deal with a toddler tantrum or demand, or just sit down for 10 minutes. There is always something, and I am actively trying to ‘just be’, a bit more. Put the phone down, get on the floor with them, and immerse myself in these beautiful children while they are this small.
I heard a saying a couple of years ago, but didn’t fully understand it, and saw it again the other day, and it really resonated with me.
‘The days are long, but the years are short.’
Yes.
This.
To be fair, my days go way too quickly, but I get it, moments can feel long and hard and like they’ll never end. Phases that Aurora goes through, can feel as though this may be a new way of life, but then all of a sudden, it’s stopped, and we’re on to the next one. Everything can feel as though it will last forever. But you’ll blink and it’ll be gone.
Anyway, as I was feeding her tonight. She has a new fluffy Chick teddy, that she got for her birthday. I have never seen so much joy on someone’s face, as I did on hers when she opened that gift. Her cheeky little munchkin smile, and she has started cuddling things. You know when they just squeeze something between their shoulder and their cheek. Ahh it is the sweetest thing, and she has reacted the exact same way every time she sees this chick. So as I was (trying to) feed her, she was giving it a cuddle, and then giving it to me. I gave it a kiss and a cuddle and then she would take it back, and this went on and on, her smile getting bigger and bigger each time. Which in turn was making me smile more and more. It felt like such an authentically happy moment, pure love.
I really am incredibly lucky to have these two little beans. I may stress about things, and get frustrated at times, or even fully angry at others. But I would not change a single thing about them. They have given me the greatest gift in the world, to be their Mummy. I truly believe it is what I was always meant to do. I need to appreciate it a little more when times are testing. But that is something I’m working on in general. I think my daily mindfulness is helping greatly, and each day I have more knowledge and experience than I did the day before. Some days will be hard, days when I’m experiencing something for the first time, and equally days when I’m experiencing the same thing for the one hundredth time, but we get through each day, and wake up to a brand new one. A clean slate. Another chance.
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